Thursday, October 14, 2010

TMI

In recognition of the fact that I have not posted for far too long, I shall follow grand blogging tradition by posting too much information, in the form of a letter to my wife:

Dear Wife,

Now that we have finished moving to a new house, there are two small, scampering secrets I should tell you.  First, about three months ago, I found your most hated bug of all time, the silverfish, in our apartment.  It was hiding behind my cello case.  Fortunately, I was able to kill it, hide the destructo-bugsmears and dispose of the evidence without you finding out about this hated intruder.  Watching Dexter has its benefits.

Second, about a month ago, while taking a shower, I was joined by a cockroach about two inches long.  This is one of the larger roaches I have seen.  You were already asleep at the time, so my options were limited, and I didn't have access to the supplies at the time to properly kill and dispose of it.  I trapped it in the bathroom trashcan with the lid securely fastened and took the trashcan outside.  As soon as I set the can down, the roach ran out.  I have no idea how that happened, but it got out (not in our house).  I did check the trashcan to make sure this wasn't a second, decoy, hitchiker roach.  It wasn't.  It was the same individual, can-pass-through-solids roach from the bathroom.  I think it is now living at our former neighbors apartment.

As you would find the discover and dispatch of these bugs highly unpleasant, I thought it best to keep it under wraps at the time.  I only tell you this now, because we have moved out of that apartment, and the bug risk is much lower. 

Therefore, I present you with a choice.  Do you prefer me to continue to stealth-strike bugs you would not like, or do you want me to tell you when I dispatch interlopers?

Love,

Me